First time !!!

I have always been a person who believed in himself. As a kid I was good in studies and managed to score a decent 70%-85% during my school days. But there were days when my mom used to pick up a cain and beat the hell out of me for not studying the way she wanted me too.

School days were never good as I was always treated as a nerd. People used to poke fun at me for being weak. But, I had good times too. I was in love with this pretty girl who used to always neatly partition her hair and never apply any make-up (actually some girls used to do that). She was very strong (mentally), smart, excellent communication skills and quite pretty. And for the strangest of reasons we became very good friends and developed a liking for each other. We used to spend a lot of time together during tuitions and after tuitions too.

Something went drastically wrong and my world fell apart. Suddenly I found her drifting away from me and from good friends we became hardly friends. It was particularly difficult for me to look into her eyes during our tuition hours. I was waiting for the day to get out of school. I never could tell her how much I loved her and wanted to be with her. And when I eventually told her (after 3 years of my school) I felt like a fool. She replied, ' i dont like boys.' And the most stupidest thought struck me,' Is she a freaking lesbian??'
But, I couldn't understand the true meaning of that statement which was she wanted me to be mature and not act like a small kid.
That was one of the most vulnerable moments of my life.... !!!